Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Reason # 42,145 that we've grown to hate hockey

We fastidiously stay away from talking hockey, mostly because there is more than enough puckheads out there who can and do blather on about it 12 months out of the year. Plus, talking about hockey with hockey fans is a bit like talking about fire with cavemen: You can tell it's important to them, but they have a hard time expressing themselves in anything but grunts and howls.

But our ire was raised this week when we read the comments of Canadian Press and Sportsnet.ca columnist Pierre LeBrun, who waxed oh-so-eloquently about the Roy Family Debacle in the Quebec League playoffs last week.

"When did the tree huggers take over this bloody country? When did we all become such bleeding hearts that a junior hockey brawl shocked our collective senses so badly we became outraged?

Cripes, if anyone should be criticized it should be Chicoutimi goalie Bobby Nadeau for standing there like a Nancy Boy and not trying to defend himself when Roy came after him?"
So if we're understanding this correctly, LeBrun is saying that he's disappointed at the fact that the country doesn't share his creepy desire to watch teenage boys beat each other up. That this 19 year-old kid from Chicoutimi, who makes a paltry $50 per week, is a coward for not fighting the rampaging lunatic kid who was being egged on by his father (who has a reputation for domestic abuse that includes calls to the Denver police and ripping doors off their hinges, presumably in front of said same kid).

And why should this young man fight? Why should he, when he has his entire life in front of him, and one that probably doesn't include hockey beyond the next couple of years? Why should he tempt fate to see if he's the first person to die in a hockey fight?

Because some creepy, goateed, corpulent middle aged white guy wants his blood lust to be satiated by watching boys beat each other up.

Yeah. Hockey's not fucked at all.

4 comments:

Colin said...

Toth had a similar article on Sportsnet, except his justification for why this isn't bad was that it used to be worse (yeah, that makes sense). This kid is a goalie, he didn't do anything wrong and he was attacked. He's the victim. What is wrong with these hockey people?

Anonymous said...

That's messed up. I have to believe LeBrun is playing devil's advocate or trying to sell himself or something. I have trouble believing someone who doesn't have "...of no fixed address" after his name is that crazy.

Joanna said...

That fight was really creepy. Roy completely wailed on that other kid. Most hockey fights are kind of mutual, agreed upon (or whatever. boys are a mystery to me). The other goalie collapsed into the fetal position while Roy pounded away. Like settle the fuck down, you spoiled shit.

Darren Priest said...

Well said. I especially like this line: "I'm glad none of my hockey brawls from my Northern Ontario minor hockey days are on YouTube."

Why's that Pierre? Wouldn't want us to see you turtling while the opposing goalie whaled on ya?

"Glory days/they'll pass ya by..."