Thursday, January 29, 2009

Dear Jillian Barberie, or Reynolds, or whatever

How's it goin'? We're doin' okay ourselves.

So listen: we've gotta talk. Now, we don't want you to take this the wrong way, because we're big fans. Really. When it comes to smokin' hot cougars from Burlington, you're definitely somewhere in the general vicinity of the upper half of our list.

And moreover, we think it's totally peachy that you lost all that weight through the twin miracles of Nutrisystem and childbirth. Good on ya.

But could you do us a favour and stop following us around the internet? Seriously, at least twice a day, you suddenly appear on our screen. It could be a baseball blog, or it might be a webring on commedia dell'arte...it almost doesn't matter. Because wherever we go, there you are in all of your blonde, bronzed, bikinied glory.

It's starting to freak us out. So be a sweetie and make it stop.

Many thanks,

The Tao

P.S. Say hi to Joe Buck for us.

6 comments:

Jesse said...

I didn't know there were still people who didn't use Firefox with Adblock Plus.

Tao of Stieb said...

Adblock Plus is a pain in the ass, and we'd rather ignore the ads as opposed to having our browser cack out on hanging scripts.

Also, sometimes we like to click on ad links when we want to support a children's charity.

Or get free access to CelebrityDownBlouses.net.

You know how it is.

The Ack said...

A quick glance at the picture begs the question:

Was Jillian named in the Mitchell report?

Someobody get Zaunie on the phone.

Tao of Stieb said...

Would that be the Mitchell Report looking into photo retouching and spray tanners?

The Ack said...

If that was the investigation that also touched on giant, blocky man-shoulders, then yes, that one.

I'm also borderline delusional with the flu right now, so there you go.

Anonymous said...

i would still lick her ass