All Hail the Blue Jays' Fab Five

Imagine if we were to have told you in the off season that after the team-wide offensive struggles in the past two seasons (R.I.P. to the careers of Mickey Brantley and Gary Denbo), five Blue Jays would get out of the gate and put up numbers that would rank them amongst the elite at their position through the month of June.

Then imagine that we told you that none of those five players were Alex Rios or Vernon Wells.

Then imagine that we were hopping on one foot when we told you this. (Actually, don't bother with that last one. We were just checking to see if you were paying attention.)

Through the team's first 71 games, the Jays have five players posting an OPS above .800, a mark that only one regular (Wells) and no qualifying batter reached for the 2008 season.

The Fab Five - Lyle Overbay (.939), Adam Lind (.915), Scott Rolen (.866), Marco Scutaro (.833), and Aaron Hill (.815) - have arguably all performed above expectations this season, but not to such an extent that you couldn't see them carrying this through to the year's end.

There are caveats, of course. Neither Overbay nor Rolen qualify for rate stats titles at this point given the amount of days they've been given off in spite of relative good health. With Cito protecting Overbay from lefties and Rolen from wear and tear, it's hard to get a real handle of what sort of offensive value they bring over the entirety of the schedule.

Mind you, Rolen's Runs Above Replacement level (RAR) is 20.7, good enough for sixth best amongst Major League third basemen, while Overbay's 17.1 places him between Ryan Howard and Joey Votto in that same category. (Not that we totally understand what any of that means...like Drew at Ghostrunners noted, we're not that good at math.)

Why are the Fab Five so Fab? Raw Power!
Speaking of that two-week old Ghostrunners post, Drew points out the great numbers now being generated from MLBAM's Hit f/x data, and demonstrates that the Jays really are hitting the ball as hard as anyone. When Fangraphs looked at the initial speeds of the ball coming off the bats for the month of April, the Jays ranked just behind Texas and Cleveland as the maddest mashers in the land.

Aaron Hill in particular hits the ball with a particularly awesome level of ultraviolence, sending the horsehide screaming off in the distance at 80.1 MPH, almost two clicks faster than the next Blue Jay, Adam Lind (78.2 MPH).

Perhaps the whistling flames shooting off the balls hit by Hill help explain one of the truly odd offensive stats this season. While Hill has hit 15 dingers to this point, he's managed just nine doubles so far, just two more than Kevin Millar. Hill leads the team with 93 hits, but is it possible that he's hitting the ball too hard, and that would be doubles are turning into singles?

The Summer of Tallet Will Scald Your Flesh
Before we forget, the Summer of Tallet continues tonight with our favorite hipster oaf taking to the mound against the Red Stockings of Johnny Feverland.

Two sweet blessings rolled into one tonight: the pitchers won't hit, meaning we won't have to watch Tallet at the bat (phew!) and he won't have to face his pitching counterpart, the slugging Micah Owings (double phew!).

Mindless idle speculatory non-speculation

As Jeremy Accardo was yanking himself out of yesterday's 9-4 win over the Nationals, a funny thought occurred to us.

Imagine that you're a pitcher, and that you got left off the roster at the beginning of the season. And imagine that your manager doesn't particularly care for you, and that the outlook for your future with the franchise was less than stellar.

And imagine that you wanted nothing more than to stick it in the ear of said manager and organization and basically rack up some Big League service time on the DL and receive your full big league salary. So you go out and toss a few pitches, then grab your side and presto! Payback and relaxation on the teams's dime!

Actually, we don't imagine that this is what Accardo is doing, and we're not just saying that because we don't want to get sued. It was just an odd thought that crossed our mind as we saw this unfolding yesterday.

But did you see Cito shaking his head in disbelief on the mound after Accardo said he couldn't go? Classic.

We'll take a win where we can get it
While giving up walkoff wins to the lowly DCers was somewhat less than optimal, yesterday's win provided a least a bit of an antidote to what could have been an awful weekend. The entire lineup (or at least the first six guys in it) looked great at the dish all day. Rios, Rolen and Overbay continued to swing hot bats, while Adam Lind worked a couple of walks that led to runs and Vernon Wells hit his second extra base hit in as many days. (Could he possibly be coming around?)

Meanwhile, RR Cool Jay got in and out of jams over seven innings, leaving a line (8 hits, 6Ks, 3 BBs, 2 ERs) that looks a lot better than the performance felt. It took him 118 pitches to get through 31 batters, and were it not for a couple of stellar defensive plays behind him, it might have looked ugly out there.

(What the fuck...why are we quibbling about quality starts and wins? Are we going to call Wilner tomorrow and talk about how awesome Reed Johnson is?)

Off days are for watching the smoldering remains of your computer
Fuck me. Everything I touch turns to dust.

It could be the power supply unit. It could be the motherboard. Or it could be both. Whatever the case, we'll be passing the hat for anyone who wishes to contribute to the Tao's Emergency Computer Repair or Replacement Fund. (There will be no tax receipts. Sorry.)

The Summer of Tallet rolls on

It's easy to get distracted by 21 hits and 14 runs, but the story of last night's 14-0 win over the Chicago White Sox may well have been the impressive outing by makeshift starter Brian Tallet.

(And even if that isn't the story, that's the angle that we're going with. Because we want to keep fueling this Summer of Tallet meme.)

Tallet's 5 2/3 innings of scoreless are impressive and most appreciated given the depleted state of the staff. And while the final score makes the game look like a laugher, Tallet did yeoman's work keeping the Pale Hose off the scoreboard early when the game was still close in the first four innings. The only blip in his performance may have been the three walks he issued, but we'll cut him a little slack on his location given the crazy swirling winds last night.

Our favorite play of the night was Tallet's perfectly executed covering of first base on a hot shot to Overbay, after which the long, lean, loping lefty continued sprinting halfway down the right field line. (You just can't stop a beast like Tallet in mid-gallop.)

And as for the offense?
If the ruling philosophy is "Get A Pitch To Drive and Hit It", then the Jays adhered to it admirably last night. It's amazing to think that they were able to score the first 13 runs without a single long ball.

Alexei Ramirez certainly helped the Jays' offense along at several crucial points last night, but maybe the lesson out of that is that a hard hit ball will always have a chance to make things happen.

(Or something like. We're pretty much making this up as we go along. When's the Ack back again?)

Serving notice

Last night's 14-3 pummeling of the Yankees was almost too much joy for one night. We laughed, we cried, we gave ourselves a shaving cream pie in the face halfway through. It was a thing of beauty.

And with this being the second time this week that they Jays ended a series against the Axis of AL East Evil with an exclamation mark, we hope that someone recognizes that this team is finally on the upswing. Scratch that: we hope that the Yanks and Sox underestimate the Jays in every series for the rest of the year.

Fun stat of the day
Roy Halladay has not lost a game against the Yankees in Toronto since Opening Day 2003.

John McDonald is the Greatest Offensive Shortstop of Our Era
Right? If nothing else, he has four doubles and five RsBI in his last ten games, hitting .297 with a respectable (for him) .721 OPS. As much as we know that you can't expect a 34 year-old journeyman infielder to become something more than he is, we still think that if he gets regular playing time and sees big league pitchers every day, Johnnie Mac can put numbers up that will be respectable enough to keep him in the lineup, and keep his glove out in the field.

Kablammo! The Editor-in-Chief checks in on the weekend

We got word from the Weekend Editor that he was coming down hard after a two-day compressed air huffing binge, so we figured we'd better set our judgments aside and open up the shop ourselves today.

Also, it's kinda hard to commit ourselves to family and relaxation when we're gleefully bouncing off the walls at the 15-4 bitchslapping that the Jays just laid upon the Beantowners.

Yah chowdah heads! Why don't you take those 15 runs and shove them up Sweet Caroline's pooper?! (Sorry about that. We're not exactly gracious in victory. Clearly, it comes from lack of experience in that particular area.)

A sweep is a sweep is sweep
Just in case you are wondering: Two wins in a shortened two-game series still constitutes a sweep in our mind. SWEEEEP, BoSox biotches!! And (excuse the Portuondo moment here): How sweeeeeep it is!

And while we should heed the perpetual admonitions of the Drunk Jays Fans to simmer down, we're buzzing a little on the idea that the Jays chopped down their deficit in the Wild Card race to seven games. What a bunch of teases these Jays are.

Don't look now, but Adam Lind is making up for lost and squandered time
It's hardly Lind's fault that he wasn't given the ABs earlier in the season, but he's certainly doing quite a job of catching up to the rest of the lineup in terms of counting stats. With his eighth homer this afternoon, he sits just three behind team leader Matt Stairs, and his four RsBI today put Lind at 34 for the season, which is within sniffing distance to Scott Rolen (38) Rod Barajas (40), Matt Stairs (41) and Marco Scutaro (42) in a fraction of the at bats.

We desperately want to see Lind take over the home run lead before the season's up. And it's not that we want to take delight in seeing a dubious player personnel decision proven wrong, but more a matter of wanting to find a reason for hope in 2009.

Roy Halladay: Still awesomely awesome
We say something along these lines every time Roy Halladay takes the mound, but Saturday night's complete game 4-1 win was yet another marvel. That's EIGHT COMPLETE GAMES on the season, more than the entire staffs of 27 other MLB teams. Only Cleveland (9) and Milwaukee (8) have as many complete games as the Good Doctor.

We're not sure if we actually appreciate on a day-to-day basis just how Halladay has moved to a whole other level in 2008. And were it not for the short-sightedness of Baseball Writers Association of America, who generally stop their examination into who deserves they Cy Young votes approximately a half a nanosecond after reviewing leader in the "wins" column, we might be able to have a really interesting debate on the relative merits of Halladay's season versus that of Cliff Lee. More on that in the coming days.

Gary Denbo must have been a really awful hitting coach

How else can you explain the Blue Jays sudden offensive explosion in his absence? Maybe he had been preaching a tantric hitting approach that finally paid off big time last night.

(Of course, there is the scary prospect of what Denbo is going to do to the Jays' minor leaguers, now that he's been offered a roaming instructor position with the team.)

The first two innings of last night's 14-1 demolition of the Reds provided a week's worth of highlights, including three homers (THREE HOMERS!), lots of extra base hits, and hitting with runners in scoring position. Not that we're going to break out the party hats and print our playoff tickets at home (for a small fee) straight away, but you've got to hope that this "see ball, hit ball" approach that the new/old regime is preaching is going to result in more big innings like last night.

Alternatively, the Jays could just try to make sure that they face Bronson Arroyo as often as possible. (Hope the singing career is going well for Bronson, because he might need something to fall back on.)

J.P. and Dunn...more hilarity!
It goes on and on and on. It's like watching The Hills, only without the hot/dumb women and Spencer's bizarre flesh-coloured beard. To be honest, we don't even give a rat's ass anymore.

Wednesdays...with J.P.?
What are the chances that the embattled GM hits the airwaves tonight? And if he does, will a minion from Rogers be sitting beside him to taser him should he make any controversial comments?

Gibby's parting words
John Gibbons appeared yesterday on the Fan 590 with Herbal Fat Boy Gord Stellick and the perpetually incredulous Damien Cox. Gibby sounded sanguine about everything that went down, and seems more or less at peace with it all. As excited as everyone is about Cito, we hope people recognize that Gibby acquitted himself pretty well, especially over the past two years. We'll miss him (and that's coming from someone who was demanding his head on a pike on this very blog.)

Stairsy makes Boof go poof

First inning grand slams are awesome, especially when they come from Matt Stairs.

We missed most of the first inning last night, so imagine our shock when we tune in and see the score at 4-3 before the sixth out of the game had been registered. Especially with Halladay on the mound, who deserved the extra run support for once.

Other things to like about last night's game:

• Two hits for Brad Wilkerson.
• Doc fighting back, and somehow becoming a strikeout pitcher again.
• That slider that Brian Tallet threw in the eighth to strike out Brendan Harris. That was so nasty, we had Janet Jackson songs running through our head for the rest of the night.
  
• Getting six runs on six hits, while holding the Twins to five runs on eleven hits.
  

Taking some time away from blogging to spend more time with work
Unfortunately, the real world has crept into our life and left us with a monstrous stack of work (real work!), so unless the Jays sign Barry Bonds or trade for Adam Dunn, things might be a tad slower in this corner in the coming days.

We could really use an intern.

Shaun Marcum's so awesome that Gregg Zaun had to touch his bum

Whatever happened in the ninth, Shaun Marcum pitched his ass off in tonight's 6-2 win over the mighty Rays. And in case you didn't know by now, Marcum leads the Jays starters in ERA (2.59) strikeouts (44) and wins (4, for whatever that's worth).

We had our apprehensions about Marcum before the season, especially after a couple of lousy spring outings. But seeing the great control he has demonstrated over his pitches over his past three outings and watching him get the strikeout when he needs it (22 over his past three outings) has us wondering if this isn't a whole other sort of breakout season for the supposed number four starter.

Oh, and another thing. Marcum's singlehandedly delivered a free slice of pizza for all of the fans in attendance at his last two starts, so show his some appreciation. Shaun Marcum is your pizza man. Manga!

Six runs!
As Jerry and Alan pointed out on the radiocast, the Jays hadn't scored more than five runs in twenty games coming into tonight's contest. The last team to have that sort of streak? The 43-win 2003 Detroit Tigers. Kinda makes ya think: If it weren't for the starters pitching their asses off in this first five weeks of the season, this could be much uglier.

With that in mind, we were immensely relieved in the eighth inning after the Jays, apparently using some sort of tantric approach scoring, finally put a five spot on board. Hell, Marco Scutaro drove in two runs, so you know that something was working.

Actually, we think that what was mostly working for the Jays in tonight's game was that they finally got into a team's bullpen. Seeing the Jays have the chance to get their cuts in against the three stooges the Rays brought in to relieve Matt Garza reminded us of just how many starters were going late into games against them over the past few weeks.

Hinske: You suck, tubby!
Watching Hinske go 0 for 3, with 2 Ks reminds us of the old days. The days he seems to have forgotten, but that are etched in our mind like a teenage cutter's scars. The days when he squandered his promise, ate himself out of a job and stole the Blue Jays' money for four years. The days when he worked his hardest to make sure that Marty Cordova wasn't the biggest Rookie of the Year flameout in recent memory.

One last thought
Scott Rolen is the greatest Jay ever.

A.J. tosses BP

To be kind, it was a less-than-stellar showing by A.J. Burnett in last night's 9-8 loss to the A's. Burnett, who gave up 10 hits and six earned in less than five innings of work, didn't seem to have it working for him at all. We always defer to the Mighty Hale on the location, speed and movement of pitches, but it looked like A.J. threw a lot of fastballs after Mike Sweeney hammered a hanging curve ball for a double in the first.

It's funny that Hale drops a Nuke Laloosh reference in the title of his post, because that's exactly what we thought of when watching the A's crush pitch after pitch in the five-run second.

Other than Brian Wolfe's inning and a third, none of the Jays pitchers looked especially sharp last night.

Looking for the silver lining
Credit the Jays' offense for not rolling over at any point. Aaron Hill continues to impress, going 4-4 with a homer and two RsBI, while Vernon Wells' swing looks scary good, and Frank Thomas seems to have awakened from his spring slumber. One of the many big "ifs" this season revolved around the offense's ability to return to form, but so far (acknowledging the standard caveat that these are early days in a long season), it looks like this lineup could be as potent as we had hoped.

God Sets Difficulty To "Rookie". Rangers Beat O's 30-3

More runs than the Jays have scored in the past week.

Halladay Shines as Jays Win Series

Jays fans took a collective breather today. Since his appendectomy, Roy Halladay's been inconsistent at best and downright lousy at worst. Certainly out of character for one of the top five pitchers in the league. But ol ' Leroy looked like he might have climbed out of the hole today as he pitched a complete game shutout --- the ninth of his career. This was the second strong start for Doc in as many games so we are pretty pleased.

His line: 9.0 IP, 0 R, 0 ER, 3 H, 1 BB, 3 K

In his post-game interview on Sportsnet, Doc attributed his recent return to form with going back to his old grip on his cutter. Doc was polite but apparently our pal Sal Fasano didn't know what the hell he was talking about. Figures.

Also impressive was the Jays timely hitting and fundamentals in the fifth inning. Two walks, two bunts, a single, a generous call, and a three run homer put the Jays ahead 5-0 and knocked rising star Felix Hernandez out of the game an inning later. Pile-on runs were too much to ask for but we got them anyway with the team scoring 8 runs in all. These guys splurge like drunken sailors on shore leave when they decide to score runs. Budget guys. Budget.

Jays Manhandle Rockies

Matt Stairs and Frank Thomas led the offensive onslaught against the bewildered Rockies at Rogers Centre yesterday. Not bad for a couple of 39 year olds. How about that?!