Stairsy makes Boof go poof

First inning grand slams are awesome, especially when they come from Matt Stairs.

We missed most of the first inning last night, so imagine our shock when we tune in and see the score at 4-3 before the sixth out of the game had been registered. Especially with Halladay on the mound, who deserved the extra run support for once.

Other things to like about last night's game:

• Two hits for Brad Wilkerson.
• Doc fighting back, and somehow becoming a strikeout pitcher again.
• That slider that Brian Tallet threw in the eighth to strike out Brendan Harris. That was so nasty, we had Janet Jackson songs running through our head for the rest of the night.
  
• Getting six runs on six hits, while holding the Twins to five runs on eleven hits.
  

Taking some time away from blogging to spend more time with work
Unfortunately, the real world has crept into our life and left us with a monstrous stack of work (real work!), so unless the Jays sign Barry Bonds or trade for Adam Dunn, things might be a tad slower in this corner in the coming days.

We could really use an intern.

An indictment with fourteen more charges against Barry Bonds

And now that we know this, is there a chance that some of people who tirelessly rant on about the Jays' urgent need for a 43 year-old outfielder who hasn't swung a bat in anger in eight months can shut up and give it a rest already?

We get that in an ideal world, Bonds could contribute greatly to the struggling offence. But seriously, do the Blue Jays really need this? Do they need the headaches that would go along with trying to get him back and forth across the border about 20 times in the next four months, or the negative attention that he would bring to the team?

Even if Bonds were an asset on the field to any team, the idea that you would invest in someone who you knew could be yanked out of your lineup (in handcuffs, no less) before the end of the season doesn't make it worth the risk.

Frank Thomas peers behind the grassy knoll

Give Frank Thomas some credit for breaking out his conspiracy theories about the baseballs being dead this year after he hit a tape-measure home run on Friday.

"It's been a strange season throughout baseball," Thomas said. "I don't want to say anything but I think something's going on with the baseballs. A lot of guys been hitting a lot of balls close to the wall and they're not flying." (Globe and Mail)

It might be tempting to write off Thomas' comments as sour grapes after a less than stellar power season, until you look around the Majors and see all of the other sluggers who are having down years.

Injuries might play a part for some of these guys, but seeing a number of players who will likely not 30 homers this season is definitely surprising.

• Manny Ramirez - 19 HRs
• Travis Hafner - 18 HRs
• Richie Sexson - 19 HRs
• Andruw Jones - 22 HRs
• Matt Holliday - 21 HRs
• Carlos Delgado - 18 HRs
• Derek Lee - 13 HRs
• Troy Glaus - 15 HRs
  

It seems a little odd to us to see this many sluggers all struggling simultaneously, and to see the power numbers decline across both leagues.

It could be (as we speculated over tasty beverages on Friday) that the quality of pitching has finally caught back up to the caliber of hitting, but to do so in the space of a single season?

Supposing that the balls are dead, there would be few teams that would be affected more by this change than the Blue Jays, a team whose offense was built around the big blast.

So, instead of blaming Gibby, Josh Towers, or Mickey Brantley for the Jays' offensive woes, perhaps we should be blaming Bud Selig?

And not to get reckless with our speculation, but do you suppose MLB might have ordered the balls to be deadened as a last resort to slow down Barry Bonds' chase of the home run record?

756*

No confetti here. We weren't excited about Sosa/McGwire back in the day (we were keenly aware of steroids since Ben Johnson) and we aren't excited about Bonds today. We would like to see Barry on the horse racing circuit with Ben though. That is something that we'd get excited about.

755*

(Rueters Photo)

Recognize the first base coach?

San Fran Shock Horror

What a surprise. Gas Can (aka Josh Towers) was given a humanitarian of the month award by the San Francisco Chamber of Commerce after last night's game for breaking Barry Bonds out of his slump. Rumor has it that Bonds will offer Towers a job as batting practice pitcher following his inevitable release by the Jays.