Some of you we'll see in April...others, not so much

At the very least, the Jays' final home series provided a bit of upbeat entertainment to wrap up baseball for the year in Toronto. A walkoff win on Saturday and a come from behind win on Sunday, and the Jays head out for one last jaunt.

And then, finally, it's over. The most miserable season since 1995 is mercifully going to end. We're going to be miserable all winter waiting for pitchers and catchers to report, but at this point, we're just anxious for this brutal campaign to conclude so that we can start talking about the important things.

Like what the hell they're going to do to fix this mess. And who the hell "they" are.

J.P. says stuff, virginal media is shocked
For a bunch of drunken syphilitic ne'er do wells, the media contingent in Toronto sure does get their pristine white cotton knickers in twist whenever J.P. Ricciardi says anything interesting.

J.P.'s interview last week with CP's Shi Davidi, wherein he pretty much stated the obvious problem of being stuck in the AL East:

"It doesn't matter if J.P. Ricciardi is the GM, or Joe Blow is the GM. Two years from now, five years from now, seven years from now, the reality that we face in Toronto is the division is not going to change. The Red Sox and Yankees are not going away. If the Yankees want to, they can take their payroll to $300 million."

That seems fair enough to us. He wasn't saying it was impossible, but just that it is never going to be easy to put together a winning team in Toronto. But this demonstration of sentience sent the collection of 13 year-old girls in Toronto sportswriter circles into fits of scandalized giggling.

"OMG, youuuuu guyyyyyssss! J.P. is soooooo, like, a hippo crit! because he totally sed sumthin different 8yrs agooooo!!"

"whatev! jp.'s totally a 5year plannnnnerrr! He came from Aukland. Moneyballlllssss! Only he said he didn't neeeeeed $$. Or ballsss!"

"JP shud be fiiiiiiiiredd! How come he says stuff? he shud just say nice stuff, like GOOO JAYS!"

"The Tampa Bays totally did good stuff one time! So how comes the J's cant? J-P's todally a loser. he's prolly gotta go."

That was fun.

The bottom line for us is this: J.P.'s knows he's getting canned, and he basically said what is completely obvious to anyone with even a passing interest in the game. Whether if that is exactly the same thing that J.P. stated on his way in is not an indication of some level of hypocrisy, but rather an indication of the changing nature of the game and the amount that he has grown into the job.

Remember, this was Ricciardi's first GM gig, and if he hadn't learned a thing over the past eight years and was still talking the same shit now that he was back then, well then we'd wonder about him.

You see, J.P. has learned something from his missteps. The field manager would do wonders for the team if he could do the same.

If you don't care, then fine. But shut the fuck up about it, okay?
You know what? When we see Vernon Wells hit a game tying home run and generally play better in the field and at the plate, we're probably going to be happy. That's the thing about us: Sometimes, we revel in the positive for the nanoseconds that it presents itself to us.

So if you want to think that nothing matters because this is September and Vernon is performing when it doesn't count and only against marginal minor leaguers like Felix Hernandez, then fine.

Think that way if you must. Go listen to Muse and cut yourself and dye your hair into three shades of raven plumage. Watch a marathon of Hostel movies. Have another drink. Read the latest copy of InterACTRA, and get your inner trade unionist riled up.

Just don't send us your thoughts. We're in a happy place, at least for a moment. Don't ruin it.

And don't call us a twat.