Wednesday, April 1, 2009

A One-Sentence Post on...Johnnie Mac

Though he made the Major League roster, that tick-tick-ticking that you hear is time running out on John McDonald's reign as everybody's all-time-favorite plucky, grindy, dirtbag, intangibly-awesome, two-million-dollar-earning, sac-bunting, all-glove-no-bat, plays-the-game-the-right-way (except-for-the-part-about-hitting-the-ball) utility bench warmer.

23 comments:

dave said...

John McDonald will be the Jays' everyday shortstop before the all-star break.

Anonymous said...

Johnny Mac will be attacked by a rabid bandicoot and miss the season due to Inglett putting a voodoo whammy on him.

Colin said...

As long as nobody else can play shortstop, his place as a benchwarmer is secure.

The Ack said...

I'm more curious as to the selection of "ie" vs "y" for Johnnie (Johnny) Mac. I feel like we should have a discussion on this.

Totally agree with the sentiment, though.

Tao of Stieb said...

Voodoo Whammy!

Wwwwhhhhhhhhhammmy!

Holy crap, we love that word.

Tao of Stieb said...

Ack:

Please refer to the Tao of Stieb Style Guide, which states that it is "y", unless we prefer "ie". And sometimes pie. Or pi.

Clear enough?

Anonymous said...

As much as I love Jonni, I will be very pleased when something occurs that very clearly makes him an irrelevant part of this team. As pointed out above by Colin, this doesn't appear to be on the horizon.

Anonymous said...

Chachi loves Jonny, and so do I. He and his wiffle bat are here to stay, get over it.

dave said...

John McDonald will hit a career best 4 home runs this season.

Anonymous said...

Dave: You think JMac will get 500 ABs or something? You crazy!

Gavin said...

Didn't you read those early spring training articles regarding Jhonny's new found devotion to the craft of batting?

Torgen said...

John eMac plays the game the right way -- he just doesn't play the game well.

Tao of Stieb said...

Jhonny Mack will get 4 homers if they move in the fences 90 feet at the Rogers Centre.

eyebleaf said...

That's an amazing sentence.

Ian H. said...

Champ Kind said it best:

"WHHHHHHHHHAMMMY!"

Tao of Stieb said...

Not that we want the comments section to degenerate into a series of Anchorman quotes...But Jean-Yves Macque's bat is like Sex Panther Cologne.

60% of the time, it works every time.

The Ack said...

Jean Mac Picard will guide the Jayship Enterprise to the galaxy of PENNANT, in the process defeating those smelly pirate whore BoSox.

Drew - LtB said...

Look Jonathon, it's the most glorious rainbow ever!

Outright release me on it!

Anonymous said...

I'm glad you liked the whammy comment. I'll expect you to use it in at least 5 posts this season. My royalty for its use will be a pony.

Gavin said...

According to baseball reference Johnay Macdonald's bat has worked 24% of the time, all the time for his career.

Mylegacy said...

Actually, the baseball reference has Jonies bat working 100% of the time in 24% of the subset under consideration.

Tao of Stieb said...

Correction noted. So Jeannie Makk's cologne should be:

LEATHER MAN...24% of the time, it works reasonably well enough to get by.

Voodoo Whammy!

dave said...

John McDonald will get a start around the end of May. In this game he will help turn two unbelievable DPs that will get Halladay out of sketchy innings.

Roy will demand Scutaro be sent down to high A.