The Alternative Level of Excellence: Nelson Liriano

With the news that Roberto Alomar will ascend into the lofty ranks of the Blue Jays' Level of Excellence on April 4th, it got us to thinking that it's about frickin' time that we induce someone into our own Alternative Level of Excellence.

It also got us thinking about the dog's breakfast of second basemen that the team has gone through over the years. You have to feel for Tony Fernandez, who never knew what he was going to see when he turned to his left.

You've got your Damaso Garcias burnin' shit up in the locker room. You've got your Mike Sharpersons who barely made the vaguest of impressions. You've got your Manny Lees, who never wanted to play second or be called "Manny" in the first place. You've got your Garth Iorgs, who was already induced into our shrine.

But if we consider Iorg a part time second bagger at best, then one man stands above all others in the ranks of middle infield mediocrity. And that man is Nelson Liriano.

Fed up with that lot of marginal-at-best goofballs, the Jays thought they had landed on something special with Liriano. After first getting the call in 1987 to supplant Sharperson as the reigning Second Baseman of the Future, Liriano played 37 games and put up mediocre numbers (.652 OPS, 2 HRs and 10 RsBI). However, his 13 stolen bases were just enough to garner him a single vote in the Rookie of the Year voting, so obviously someone in the Toronto contingent had a mancrush on speedsters. (Liriano came in sixth behind some juiced-up ginger name McGwire.)

Liriano spent much of the next season watching from the bench, and did little to push the reluctant secong baseman Manuel Lee out of the starting spot. (It's really saying something about your lack of offensive prowess when Manny Lee's got close to 70 points in OPS over you.) Moreover, Liriano made 12 errors in 80 games at second for a less-than-dazzling .961 fielding percentage. But, again, he stole 12 bags, and in that era, that meant something. Supposedly.

In 1989, Liriano finally stepped up and grasped the brass ring (or is that the Brass Rail...we always confuse the two.) In 122 games at second, Liriano managed to keep his errors steady at 12, and shone (well, in relative terms) with .707 OPS, 5 HRs and 53 RsBI. And since you asked, 16 steals. Plus, he swiped three more bags in three playoffs.

But as Trooper once sang so poignantly, Liriano was here for a good time, not a long time. In 1990, his numbers dipped into the microscopic realm. We don't think we've ever seen anything quite as small as a .294 slugging percentage, but we've never stood next to Torgen at the urinal. (Hey-o!) Liriano was supplanted one last time by Lee, before getting shipped to Minnesota in a trade for (seriously, get a load of this) John Candelaria. Yikes.

The rest of Liriano's post-Jays career is all a bit of a non-descript blur (Minny, minors, expansion Rockies, sucky Bucs, Royals and back to the Rockies.) It is notable that when all was said and done, Nellie finished off his career with more triples than homers : 27 to 25, helped along by the seven that he put up in a third of a season on the pool table felt in the Metrodome.

Nowadays, Liriano can be found in the batting cages of the Wilmington Blue Rocks, where he serves as hitting coach to the Advanced A Carolina League prospects of the Kansas City Royals.

For never fulfilling his modest promise, for offering little more than the occasional burst of speed, and for helping to dispel the notion that Dominican middle infielders are great with the glove, the Tao of Stieb hereby induces Nelson Arturo (Bonilla) Liriano into the Alternative Level of Excellence.

Long may you run.

The Alternative Level of Excellence – Garth Iorg

When it comes to funny names, stupid batting stances, and being at the centre of our greatest moment of Blue Jays heartbreak, few can hold a candle to Garth Iorg.

Iorg was a mainstay of the Blue Jays lineup throughout their emergence in the 1980’s, mostly sharing third base duties with the vastly superior Rance Mulliniks (back when Jimy Williams seemed to want a left-right platoon at every position on the diamond.). He was also a place holder at second in 1987, bridging the gap between the illustrious Damaso Garcia era and the incomparable Manny Lee era.

Iorg stuck around so long that in our memory, we figured he must have brought something to table. And then we looked at the numbers.

In nine MLB seasons, all with Toronto, Iorg hit 20 homers, drove in 238 and put up a lilliputian .639 OPS. Iorg had his best season 1985, putting up an .827 OPS, hitting seven homers and driving in 37 in 288 ABs.

For us, the lasting image of Garth Iorg will always be his last major league at bat versus Frank Tanana in the final game of that painfully fateful 1987 season. Trailing 1-0 with two out in the ninth, and having squandered a 3 ½ game lead in the final week of the season by losing six in a row, Iorg was the Jays last hope.

We can’t tell you how many times this scene has played out in our heads. Not even back-to-back World Series championships have managed to ease our pain.

The "ground out 1-3" scoring play can’t begin to describe what a feeble tapper Iorg dribbled a few feet in front of the plate. Coming out of his dubious extreme leanback stance, Iorg waved his bat so weakly at the ball, we could have sworn it was made of fine crystal. And with that, the hopes of a nation and the postseason aspirations of one of the finest Blue Jays teams ever assembled were dashed.

And so, for breaking our hearts, for his ability to stick in the Majors in the face of his almost unrivalled mediocrity, and for his ridiculously unsound hitting technique, The Tao of Stieb hereby enshrines Garth Iorg onto the Alternative Level of Excellence.

(Thanks to all who’ve made suggestions as to who should receive our dubious little honour. We’ve got ideas for future inducements, but feel free to make your case, either in the comments or by hitting us with them here.)

The Alternative Level of Excellence – Junior Felix

The Blue Jays’ Level of Excellence features a number of laudable honorees, who made a significant impact on baseball in Toronto, and who are worthy of the place of honor that they now occupy on the concrete facing of the Rogers SkyDomey Centre.

We at the Tao of Stieb don’t wish to dispute the names that are thus far missing from the Level of Excellence (*cough cough * Jimmy Key *cough*). Instead, we propose the Alternative Level of Excellence, which will honor those who will likely never be formally enshrined. These are the former Blue Jays whose names will inevitably elicit a smile, a laugh, a knowing nod, or a prolonged groan from the true fan.

Today’s inaugural honoree: Junior Felix. Number 54 (or 47) in your programs. Number 1 in your hearts.

Felix debuted on May 3^rd, 1989 as a defensive replacement for George Bell. The next day, he started as the Jays DH, hitting out of the nine hole. In the first pitch of his first at bat, he hit a home run off of the pride of Kapuskasing, Kirk McCaskill. (Try saying "Kirk McCaskill from Kapuskasing" five times fast. Yikes.)

Felix’s birthdate is listed as October 3^rd, 1967, which would have made him 21 on his debut. However, it soon became an open secret that he may have been significantly older. Some suggested as much as a decade older than he claimed. (The Jays signed him as a free agent in 1985, so clearly, something was amiss with those dates. Unless they were given to signing pre-teens to contracts back then.)

Junior played 237 games with the Jays between 1989 and 1990, hitting 24 homers, stealing 31 bases and driving in 111. He played four more years for the Angels, Marlins, and Tigers, before retiring to collect his old age pension in 1994.

His greatest contribution to the cause was likely the return the Jays received when they rolled his allegedly old bones out the door in a deal at the Winter Meetings in December of 1990. Coming back to the Jays in the multiplayer deal: Devon White.

Ladies and Gentlemen, please join us in welcoming to the Tao of Stieb's Alternative Level of Excellence, Junior Felix.

(BTW, if you'd like to nominate any former Jays for the Alternative Level of Excellence, hit us with them here.)