1 hour, 50 minutes

That's how long it took Roy Halladay to beat Mark Buehrle 2-0 tonight for his 100th career win. Which means the good folks at Sportsnet Connected are freaking right now.

Halladay (7 IP, 7 Ks, 0 BBs) not only went to the mound tonight without his appendix, but he also traded in his rugged beard for a A.J. Burnett Signature Model Junior Goatee.

Doc also threw a cutter that Our Pal Sal Fasano helped fix, which begs the question: when Gregg Zaun comes back next week, do they send Fasano to Syracuse, or do they leave Jason Phillips at the curb?

Bonus Coverage: Yes Network - the State Broadcaster of the Evil Empire - has posted a postgame interview with A-Rod after last night's douchetacular display. They don't allow the videos to be embedded (EVIL!), but you can catch the Rodriguez in all his douchey glory right here.

Maybe he was preoccupied with thoughts of muscular, she-male types.

Jackass

The Jays were down 7-5 to the Yankees in the top of the ninth -- A-Rod at first and Matsui at third --two out. Posada lifted an infield fly between 3rd base and second as callup Howie Clark (3B) and SS John MacDonald eased towards the ball to make the easy play. But they didn't. The ball dropped between them. Why? As the replys clearly show and as the Jays' infielders will tell you, somebody (aka Alex Rodriguez) other than Clark or MacDonald yelled "Mine!" causing each player to think that the other was going to field the ball. How clever. Something that we want young kids to emulate. The equivalent of an office worker forging a letter to get a coworker fired. Of draining the brake fluid on an adversary's car. Troy Glaus put it best -- Not since I think 'Major League II,' the movie; I think that's the only time I've ever seen it on the field," Glaus said. "I've never heard of someone doing it and I've never seen anybody do it. That's not proper. That's not the right thing to do."

What did A-Rod have to say about it? "I could care less," Rodriguez said. "We're looking not to be swept. It really doesn't make a difference; we won. Those guys have their opinions, our guys have ours. I'm fine with that."

He's an "A-1" Jackass.

A-Rod Seeks Answers to Yankees' Woes At Brass Rail

That bastian of serious journalism, the NY Post reported today that Alex Rodriguez was spotted in Toronto hanging with a blonde who is not his wife. To add to the intrigue, the unnamed witness also saw the pair have dinner together and slip in to the infamous Brass Rail strip club on Yonge Street. Almost as wise a move as playing the bunt that was obviously going foul in last night's game.

Jays Steal One From Yanks

A certain columnist from a certain newspaper in Toronto has long been bemoaning the Jays reliance on the home run instead of small ball tactics (He'd be happier if they were an NL team in general. Especially if they relocated to a city other than Toronto.). Well he should be pleased with the past few games. Last night's in particular.

Since the juggernaut offence has not been working as advertised, John Gibbons has been forced to rely on a bag of NL tricks to get runs. Bunts, steals, sac flies, pitching matchups, and stellar defense were keys to last night's victory. Aaron Hill's thrilling steal of home on Pettite in particular was the ultimate small ball play.

But while that style can be very exciting, doubles and home runs are better from a winning standpoint in the AL where most teams can really rake. It was lucky for the Jays that the Yankees are slumping badly. Otherwise we may be talking about a spirited 7-3 loss. So, we are glad that the approach worked out in the past couple of games, but we need to see the big lumber come out of its slumber.

It's Official. Jays Back on CBC.

The Canadian Broadcasting Corporation (CBC) and the Blue Jays announced a formal two year deal that will see the public broadcaster carry 8 games this year and 20 to 30 next year. The CBC was the original broadcaster of Blue Jays games back in 1977, but hasn't carried a game since 2002. As a condition of the contract, the Jays must act 35% more Canadian. In order to pull this off the Jays will institute long waiting lists for access to medical staff and relocate the team to Fort McMurray.

The Wolfe-Man cometh

The Jays recalled Brian Wolfe from Syracuse last night, sending Ryan Roberts back to the Chiefs.

Wolfe (21.1 IP, 0.84 ERA, 20Ks, 4 BBs) is third pitcher from our very hand and obviously helpful Armchair GM post last month to get the call. (Unfortunately, Matt Roney will not likely see any action for the Jays.)

We’re hopeful that Wolfe can provide some added depth to the bullpen, and will help preserve the Janssen-Downs-Accardo troika that has performed so well lately.

But with this move, the Jays will now be carrying 13(!) pitchers, two of whom (Gas Can Towers and Jamie Vermilyea) have contributed less than the bat boys over the past two weeks.

Vermilyea hasn’t pitched since tossing three innings on May 10 against the BoSox, while Towers' last two appearances were on May 9 (3 IPs and 3ERs vs. Boston) and May 19 (1 IP, 0 ERs vs. Philly.)

Maybe those pitchers don't necessarily deserve any real-time access to a Major League pitching mound, but if J.P. shortens the bench to this extent, ostensibly because he can't figure out what to do with those two pitchers, it demonstrates just how shallow the Jays are in MLB-calibre position players.

But hey, we hear Shea Hillenbrand might be available!

Yankees Lose! Theeeee-eeeeeee-eee YANKEES! LOSE!

With all due deference to John Sterling, maybe he should change his to signature call to reflect the times.

And full credit is due to Dustin McGowan, not only for his ostentatiously stupid looking facial hair, but for pulling together 7 and 2/3rds of excellent ball against a lineup that can still rake. This was by far his best outing of the season.

Also: Lyle Overbay looks like he's found his stroke again. After tonight's 3 for 5 showing with a homer and two RsBi, he's now hit safely in five straight, with five extra base hits.

And in other good news: Gregg Zaun will start his rehab stint this week, and could be back as soon as next week. (And not a moment too soon...God love Jason Phillips, we're getting sick of seeing him catch every night.)

And that's not all: Doc's back on Thursday. As if.

Heavens to Betsy! McGowan Gets Out of the Fifth Unharmed!

Nuff said...

A visit from the Evil Empire ain't what it used to be

After getting swept by the Angels this weekend, the Yankees limp into T.O. six games under .500, sitting in fourth place, a half-game back of the Jays and 12.5 back of the Red Sox.

It looks really good on them.

Seeing the names of the pitchers who'll toe the rubber for the Yanks in this series - Matt DeSalvo (1-1, 5.29) and Tyler Clippard (1-1, 3.60) , sandwiched around the aging Andy Pettitte (3-3, 2.66) - it gives a modicum of hope to us here.

That is, until we remember that Mickey Brantley is still the Jays' hitting coach.

Rumor Mill: Bedard a Jay?

Sportsnet's Jamie Campbell reports in his "blog" that an executive from the Orioles believes that Erik Bedard will make a run for the border when his current contract is up. In 2010. While we would love to see this happen, we find it pretty hard to get excited about a rumour that (a) is only supposed to happen three years from now (what could change in three years), and (b) was probably based on smalltalk from an exec who knew that Cambpell, like Bedard, is from Canada. Kind of a change of pace from the normal, "You're from Canada? Do you know ...[insert name here]."

One thing that has always bothered us as Jays fans is the dearth of actual insider info about the team. The blame is probably evenly shared by the secretive management of the Jays in conjunction with the Toronto baseball press. Let's just say that if the Jays played in Boston or New York, we'd know why John Gibbons keeps benching Alex Rios.

Cold As Ice

Vernon Wells has still not emerged from the slump brought on by the sniffles last month. After yesterday's loss to the Twins, he said all of the usual things that a batter in a slump says (ie. getting better swings) but we don't see the results. All we know is that this team ain't going anywhere near .500 until V-Dubya starts knocking in runs.

The Marathon Men: Jays Win In Thirteen Innings

Before last night's game, we discussed Tomo Ohka's return to the rotation and how he had hoped to get real run support when he signed with the Jays. Well, he got it last night. By the time he left in the eighth, the Jays had scored 7 runs on 3 HRs leaving the rock solid bullpen combo of Janssen/Accardo with a Cadillac Comfortable 7-2 lead. Happy ending for Ohka right?

Add bullpen meltdown as a tag to the right hand column. Janssen came in and got jacked by Michael Cuddyer for two runs in the eighth. In the ninth Jeremy Accardo had his run-free innings streak snapped big time by a Twins team that put on a batting clinic resulting in a tie game. And the marathon began.

Brian Tallet was the pitching star last night. The gangly left hander pitched 2.2 innings of no hit baseball to allow the Jays offense the time to squeeze out the victory in the 13th on an RBI single by Lyle Overbay.

Highlights:

• "Is it safe?" The play of the night was our pal Sal Fasano's blocking of the plate to get Michael Cuddyer out at home in the fifth. He forced Cuddyer to slide past the plate without tagging and then darted towards him once he had stopped to get the out.


• Homer Dome indeed. The Jays (Overbay, Stairs, Clayton, and Rios) slugged 4 HRs in last nights game. Highest total this year.


• Manny? Matt Stairs' play in left field reminds us of another guy who often gets little respect for his defense. Like Manny, his arm sometimes makes up for his lack of agility. For the second time this week, Stairs recovered from fumbling the ball by nailing a baserunner trying to take advantage of the situation. We'd like to think that he does that on purpose.


• Rios and Stairs are red hot right now. Take note of that Gibby. No more riding the pine for Rios.


• Hard as Ohka. Tomo Ohka pitched a gutsy game last night and gave the team every opportunity to win. He was cheated.
• Defense with a capital D. John MacDonald's stellar double play at 3rd base in the late innings yesterday made our collective jaws drop. He can stick around.

Ohka Returns To Rotation Versus The Twins

Tomo Ohka (aka Bobby Bitterman) returns to the Jays rotation in Game 2 of the series versus the Twins tonight. Look for him to be a bit rusty after a long layoff after the arrival of young Jesse Litsch. He came to the Jays because he thought that he would get the run support that he never had with the Expos/Nationals. Hopefully the Jays finally deliver on that.

Coming Soon! Tao of Stieb Tees

OK. We're going commercial. Coming soon to a web browser near you will be a Tao of Stieb shop where you will be able to buy, amongst other things, nifty Tao of Stieb t-shirts.

Examining Gibby's Rationale

In the Star's game story from last night, Gibby's states his rationale for sitting Rios is that he wanted to get as many lefty bats in the lineup as possible against the right-handed Jeremy Guthrie.

Except that in Rios slugs 115 points higher against righties than Lind (.519 to .404), and has exactly twice as many homers (8 to 4) and RsBI (18 to 9) as Lind versus righties in just 28 more ABs.

Maybe the Jays want to find comfortable situations to insert Lind into the lineup, but given his precipitous slide in the past few weeks (along with Matt Stairs' sudden emergence), the time may be right to send Lind back to Syrcuse for a little more seasoning.

A hat tip to Neate at Out of Left Field, who quite rightly compares a Gibby-Sam Perlozzo managing showdown to the Jeopardy sketches on SNL. (Although we would have referenced the much funnier "Half Wits" sketches from SCTV, which SNL clearly ripped off.)