West Coast road trip blues

Not a great morning in the house (mom's basement) of the Ack today. Ignoring the feeling of my throat being on fire, the sensation of a spike being driven into my sinuses, and a mild draught beer hangover (boo fucking hoo, right?), there was snow falling as I dragged my carcass out of bed. On May 9th. Snow. Awesome.

Oh, and our beloved Jays handed a game to Billy Beane's Oakland A's last night, stranding 10 runners in the process and unable to overcome the A's five-run 2nd. Ironically, the bright spot for the Jays was the man who shit all over that 2nd inning, Scott Richmond. Call me crazy, but I thought he showed the poise of a ten year vet by bouncing back and shutting the door the rest of the way.

No matter, a Jays win this afternoon behind Brian Tallet's moustache and a beyond-the-recommended dosage of cold medication should snap me out of this funk, right? No? Fuck off then. Er, I mean, go Jays.

Last-minute minor league news and notes
Admitting the mailed-in nature of the post, some minor league takes for you:

Lansing - after a slow start to the season, 19-year old burner Kenny Wilson has found his singles stroke (not like that, perv) and is currently riding a 6-game hit streak, during which he's amassed 11 hits, 6 steals - and perhaps most importantly, only 3 K's. Keep your eye on this kid.

Dunedin - Ricky Romero got slapped around in his first rehab start, to the tune of 6 runs over 4 innings pitched, but he only walked one batter and rang up five K's. I'm not concerned. Get well soon, Ricardo.

New Hampshire - Brian Dopirak put up a PlayStation line with his 5 for 6, 2 HR, 8 RBI effort in last night's annihilation of Connecticut. At 25 years old, Dopirak needs to make a move soon, but his stats line thus far in AA is cartoonish. Also, breakout prospect Brad Emaus continues to rake.

'Vegas - let's just not discuss David Purcey's start last night. It's for the best. Um, get well soon, Ricky.

What's that awful taste in our mouth

Is it the two days worth of retching until we blew out the capillaries around our eyes, or is it the fact that we just watched the Jays, with last night's 5-3 loss to the Disney World Rays, slip into last place in the AL East.

We're leaning towards the latter.

A few thoughts on the past couple of nights.

How many catchers can you fit into one lineup? Apparently, at least three. With Zaunie handling the actual catching duties, Rod Barajas taking over for an ailing Lyle Overbay at first, and rookie Robinson Diaz DHing, the Jays packed the lineup with backstops last night. Being the negative Nellies that we are, we immediately started contemplating what would happen if Gorman Thomas came crashing into Zaun, and the Jays were forced to re-jig the lineup on the go. Thankfully, all three of them made it through the game healthy, although their performance (0-11, topped off by a Diaz flailing at a Troy Percival breaking ball for strike three in the ninth) left something to be desired.

At least were not along in our misery: Apparently, we're not the only ones who are miserably sick. There is some sort of flu-like thing going through the Jays' clubhouse, which felled Alex Rios last night. Not that we're looking to make excuses for the team, but if they had anything close to what we had, then we get why they've looked listlessly awful over the past week, losing six of their last eight.

Who needs a bullpen? It took Roy Halladay 107 pitches to get through last night's game for his second straight complete game loss. The question for us is: Are the Jays running the risk of burning him out this early in the season? Doc looked fine at that point, and his greatest strength is his efficiency, so surely there's nothing to worry about. Right?

Matt Stairs is awesome: Boo yah!

Down with the sickness

We're not sure what we've got...maybe it's just a general malaise, or maybe it's a rockin' pneumonia, or maybe our will to get out of bed in the morning is just slip-sliding away. Whatever the case, we don't think we can pin all of our nausea and vertigo on the Jays' performance lately.

In our weakened state, we bailed on last night's 6-4 loss to the A's in the 5th. Generally speaking, if you're watching a game where Jason Frasor is on the mound, and Gas Can Towers is warming up in the bullpen, it's probably time to go through your mental list of household chores that you've been putting off for too long. (Or you can do as we did, and pull the covers over your head to really make the most of your fever dreams. Trippy!)

What we missed, though, was Dusty Lambchops coming into the game as a pinch runner in the eighth, and coming around to score. How cool is that?