Jays seed the clouds with home run balls

Yeah yeah yeah, we know. We shouldn't get too excited over beating up on a bunch of minor league arms in Boston.

(And on that note: Were we the only ones who were relieved that this Michael Bowden cat is still in Boston's system and wasn't part of a Halladay trade? Seriously, all those internet based scouting analysts really don't know nuthin' 'bout nuthin' in the end, do they?)

But come on. Isn't it a stitch to watch Aaron Hill and José Bautista and Rod Barajas send dingers into Boston's night time skyline? Why must people try to ruin this for us?

Praise the rain
Thankfully for Jays fans, the rains came pouring down exactly at the point where Casey Janssen had begun to hand the game back to the Red Sox. Watching Janssen walk two and give up a double to that little rat-faced elf Dustin Pedroia, we could feel a big BoSox turnaround coming on like a freight train (even with the six-run lead.)

Given Cito's dubious handling of the bullpen, we could have seen him leaving Janssen in to burnish his .940 OPS against. Yikes.

Everybody loves Janssen because he's plucky as all get out, but dude needs to be far away from the Jays' pitching staff next season if they are going to have a shot at...well...nevermind.

Travis Snider is a BP Wizard

The Great Big Giant Pasty White Hope^TM Travis Snider added to his resume last night, winning the 2008 Irving Oil Home Run Derby. And for our eastern Canadian friends, yeah, it's THAT Irving Oil, so we think that Trav might have just won himself a hot turkey sandwich at the Irving Big Stop of his choice. (We recommend the one just outside of Moncton as a great hangover cure.)

Check out this video (courtesy the New Hampshire Union Leader) of Snider's Derby exploits, including his awesome All Hail Me victory bat flip, which would make even Manny Ramirez blush.

Hey, at least he didn't pull a Jason Bay

After lighting up the second round of the "State Farm Home Run Derby, brought to you by State Farm, State Farm, Official Sponsor of Major League Baseball, and of the State Farm Home Run Derby"*, Alex Rios managed just two in the finals.

Still, we think the douches over at the Big Picture owe dude an apology.

(*Actual ad copy read tonight.)

Alex Rios has 45 career homers. Deal with it, bitches.

We'll be watching Alex Rios in tonight's Home Run Derby with the sound off. One can only take so much of Chris Berman's "back back back back back...gone!" shtick before their frontal lobe spontaneously combusts.

Related: The Big Picture has taken five minutes to stop jerking off to chicks in body spray commercials to rip Rios' inclusion in the Homer Run Derby.

Live Update (10:06 pm): 17 bombs in two rounds, and Rios is out in front. And A-Rod is in a suit, talking to Barry Bonds and wondering why everyone hates him.