Thud

Well, that didn't go quite as planned, did it?

It would be easy to start assessing blame and pointing fingers at this point by questioning why Canada left its best starter on the shelf for the entire tournament, or wondering what was going through Matt Stairs' head as he left six runners on base by flailing at pitches out of the zone. But none of that is going to help put Canada back in this year's event, so why bother?

(But is there a chance that this two-and-out result might help quiet the cult of the Ernie Whitt? Because that shit should pretty much end right about now.)

Maybe at this point, we can just tip our newly purchased Team Canada caps towards Chris Denorfia and Chris Cooper and Jason Grilli and the entire Italian team, who played a hell of a game when it counted. In a knockout tournament like this one, these things are going to happen.

And as we're sitting here feeling like a pile of beaver turd, somewhere in Arizona, Ryan Dempster is regaling someone with his Harry Carey impression. Prick.

Friday Rock Out - The Incredible Bongo Band's "Let There Be Drums"

We're totally losing our mind with excitement over tomorrow's Canada-U.S. WBC tilt, and this little rocking gem is serving as a nice soundtrack for us as we bounce off the walls like a kid with three packs of Lik-m-Aid in him. Woo!

Incidentally, those from the East Coast may remember this song as the theme from late lamented Atlantic Grand Prix Wrestling. (Leo Burke! The Great Malumba! The Cuban Assassin! Leapin' Lanny! Killer Karl Krupp! "No Class" Bobby Bass! Coming to the Berwick Arena on Thursday! The Montague Coliseum on Friday! And the Colchester Stadium in Truro on Sunday!)

In fact, we think Matt Stairs should totally be playing this as he steps to the plate this weekend, and not just because he looks like he should be a wrestler in minor territory circa 1982.

Whether if you're headed down to the Dome, or if you plan to watch from home, we hope that this weekend's games warm your cockles and get you psyched for the season to come.

Let there be baseball.

We've got us a touch of the WBC Fever

How funny is it to see a Tim Horton's cup - presumably a double-double - nestled at the feet of the anonymous Canadian in between Corey Koskie and Justin Morneau in the picture above. We don't even especially like Timmy's, but if blind patriotism is the order of the day, then we fully support our boys getting some Timbits shipped to their camp in Dunedin.

We're probably a sucker or a chump for having bought into this whole World Baseball Classic tomfoolery. But now that we've finally caved and bought our tickets, we're getting seriously geeked to see the Canada-U.S. game on Saturday afternoon.

We don't care if we're going to freeze our ass off on the walk to the ballpark. We don't care if we're going to end up sitting next to Americans. We don't even care if they are exhibition games. We're just glad to know that sometime on Saturday afternoon, we're going to hear the crack of the bat and the snap of a ball hitting leather.

On the other hand, we might just be happy to take a breather from talking ourselves into the idea that the 2009 season won't be a complete loss for the Jays.

We managed to catch a few innings of this afternoon's game, and it has us all the more stoked. Sure, we're a little concerned when we see pitches sailing to the backstop and catchers making ill-advised throws into the ground after fielding said wild pitches. Nevertheless, we like the look of the lineup that Canada is going to be able to roll out for a few games.

It's just too bad that all the good Canadian pitchers are such a bunch of bitches. (Yeah, ya heard right Dempster...bitches.)

Speaking of pitchers, how's this for a warm up to the WBC: the heavily left-handed Canadians will face World Series MVP southpaw Cole Hammels when they play the Phillies tomorrow. Nice.

We don't get a moment to spare for some bust-out humanitarian down on his luck lately

Pity poor Ryan Dempster. This should have bee a great offseason for him.

First, he takes to the Chicago Cubs to the cleaners on a four-year, $52 million contract that has future regrets written all over it. Then, he's able to opt out of pitching for Canada in the World Baseball Classic, dedicating himself to regaling the Second City's press corps with bon mots and bad impressions in between sessions of sunning himself in Arizona and soft-tossing at minor leaguers for an inning or two.

Unfortunately for Ginger Balls, a few random Canadian yahoos have had the temerity to wonder why he is being such a pantywaisted nancy-boy when it comes to the WBC. Random yahoos like the Greatest Canadian to Swing a Bat in Anger, Larry Walker.

The attacks have gotten so fierce that the red-haired right-hander thrust himself into the understanding arms of Ken Rosenthal, who consoled him in a January 26 post at foxsports.com.

"I respect the game. I play hard. Now I'm getting criticized in Canada for the first time in my career just because I choose not to play in an exhibition tournament. How crazy is that?"

It's not actually that crazy, really. Surely, Dempster knew that balking at wearing the maple leaf wouldn't go over well in the nation that mints Paul Henderson's 1972 Summit Series goal on its currency.

Moreover, a pitcher who was allegedly healthy enough to sign a long-term contract just a couple of months ago should probably be healthy enough to come to Toronto for a weekend and throw three innings of baseball. This isn't exactly a Sisyphean task.

Don't get us wrong here. We don't want to castigate Dempster for making his choice. It was his to make, and if it makes sense to him, then so be it. We just wish he would shut up, stop whining and acting like a victim and OWN HIS DECISION.

If there is a positive to take out of this episode, it's that this hopefully means that Dempster won't be able to trade on his Canadian passport to get media work on this side of the 49th after his arm goes flying off into the third base dugout at Wrigley. Because we remember his "analysis" on Sportsnet's playoff coverage a few years back, and his scorn for the entire exercise was palpable.

So long, and thanks for all the grit

Our compadre Shortwaveboy once said that the Jays will never win anything as long as they continued to give regular playing time to Reed Johnson. That was before RJ's big year and run at the batting title 2006, and for a time, it was easy to write it off. But the comment stuck in our head ever since.

If there was any truth to that statement, then yesterday's news that the team had cut the "gritty" and "scrappy" outfielder loose is truly a happy moment, and a turning point for the team. You'd never know it to read all of the maudlin eulogizing of Reed's time in Toronto, but the truth is that he's been living on borrowed time for as long as he's been a Blue Jay.

Plus, he runs like a girl.

We've noted before that with a bit of digging, you'll find that Johnson's brilliant career with the Jays was comprised of a lot of replacement-level, marginal performance with the exception of about nine weeks of good fortune.

Sure, he's a gamer who runs hard (if not fast or in a masculine manner), and he's a guy who'll lay out for balls in the outfield. He's got spunk, but to quote Lou Grant, we hate spunk.

If you're feeling down about Reed Johnson's fate today, just take a moment and compare the man'd performance to any of the outfielders on the Red Sox, Yankees, Indians, Tigers, White Sox or Mariners. Those are the teams the Jays are going to have to beat if they expect to make a run at anything meaningful this year, and Reed Johnson wouldn't rate a bench spot any of their rosters, much less the starting left field job.

Other thoughts that percolated whilst we were in self-imposed exile:

Ouch!
The story about Scott Rolen's fingernail grosses us out too much to discuss. Yeesh. Of course, it is another hand injury to a hitter, so if Rolen is hitting .247 with 4 homers in mid-July, we're sure we're going to hear about this mangled digit lots this year. Or we'll get to know Marco Scutaro really well.

There's no good story that can't be ruined by a Paul Godfrey quote
We were really excited to hear the news that Toronto will be hosting first round games in the World Baseball Classic, and were trying to figure out how we get tickets. Then we read this quote in a Blair article about the forthcoming tourney from our old pal Godfrey: "(Y)ou'd like to think that you'll be able to attract fans from some of those baseball cities in the northern U.S.," Godfrey said. "I mean, you see a city like Detroit and with Magglio Ordonez likely to be with the Venezuelans, that would be a draw."

Jeebus Cripes on Segway, Godfrey! Can you stop fixating on bringing fans from outside of Toronto to the city, and start thinking about your own fan base?!