Though he made the Major League roster, that tick-tick-ticking that you hear is time running out on John McDonald's reign as everybody's all-time-favorite plucky, grindy, dirtbag, intangibly-awesome, two-million-dollar-earning, sac-bunting, all-glove-no-bat, plays-the-game-the-right-way (except-for-the-part-about-hitting-the-ball) utility bench warmer.
Often Irreverent, Mostly Rational Blog for Fans of the Toronto Blue Jays. One Day, We'll Be Perfect.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
A One-Sentence Post on...Johnnie Mac
Though he made the Major League roster, that tick-tick-ticking that you hear is time running out on John McDonald's reign as everybody's all-time-favorite plucky, grindy, dirtbag, intangibly-awesome, two-million-dollar-earning, sac-bunting, all-glove-no-bat, plays-the-game-the-right-way (except-for-the-part-about-hitting-the-ball) utility bench warmer.
John McDonald will be the Jays' everyday shortstop before the all-star break.
ReplyDeleteJohnny Mac will be attacked by a rabid bandicoot and miss the season due to Inglett putting a voodoo whammy on him.
ReplyDeleteAs long as nobody else can play shortstop, his place as a benchwarmer is secure.
ReplyDeleteI'm more curious as to the selection of "ie" vs "y" for Johnnie (Johnny) Mac. I feel like we should have a discussion on this.
ReplyDeleteTotally agree with the sentiment, though.
Voodoo Whammy!
ReplyDeleteWwwwhhhhhhhhhammmy!
Holy crap, we love that word.
Ack:
ReplyDeletePlease refer to the Tao of Stieb Style Guide, which states that it is "y", unless we prefer "ie". And sometimes pie. Or pi.
Clear enough?
As much as I love Jonni, I will be very pleased when something occurs that very clearly makes him an irrelevant part of this team. As pointed out above by Colin, this doesn't appear to be on the horizon.
ReplyDeleteChachi loves Jonny, and so do I. He and his wiffle bat are here to stay, get over it.
ReplyDeleteJohn McDonald will hit a career best 4 home runs this season.
ReplyDeleteDave: You think JMac will get 500 ABs or something? You crazy!
ReplyDeleteDidn't you read those early spring training articles regarding Jhonny's new found devotion to the craft of batting?
ReplyDeleteJohn eMac plays the game the right way -- he just doesn't play the game well.
ReplyDeleteJhonny Mack will get 4 homers if they move in the fences 90 feet at the Rogers Centre.
ReplyDeleteThat's an amazing sentence.
ReplyDeleteChamp Kind said it best:
ReplyDelete"WHHHHHHHHHAMMMY!"
Not that we want the comments section to degenerate into a series of Anchorman quotes...But Jean-Yves Macque's bat is like Sex Panther Cologne.
ReplyDelete60% of the time, it works every time.
Jean Mac Picard will guide the Jayship Enterprise to the galaxy of PENNANT, in the process defeating those smelly pirate whore BoSox.
ReplyDeleteLook Jonathon, it's the most glorious rainbow ever!
ReplyDeleteOutright release me on it!
I'm glad you liked the whammy comment. I'll expect you to use it in at least 5 posts this season. My royalty for its use will be a pony.
ReplyDeleteAccording to baseball reference Johnay Macdonald's bat has worked 24% of the time, all the time for his career.
ReplyDeleteActually, the baseball reference has Jonies bat working 100% of the time in 24% of the subset under consideration.
ReplyDeleteCorrection noted. So Jeannie Makk's cologne should be:
ReplyDeleteLEATHER MAN...24% of the time, it works reasonably well enough to get by.
Voodoo Whammy!
John McDonald will get a start around the end of May. In this game he will help turn two unbelievable DPs that will get Halladay out of sketchy innings.
ReplyDeleteRoy will demand Scutaro be sent down to high A.